I mean, I get it. Toxic heterosexuality is disgusting and hurts straight men and women, and encourages straight men to see marriage as a punishment that takes away their freedom, and straight women as a punishment that turns them into a caretaker.

While same-sex relationships don’t have to deal with toxic heterosexuality, they aren’t less toxic by virtue of not being heterosexual. I really get uncomfortable seeing lesbian relationships in particular portrayed as universally soft and perfect. They aren’t. People are still people, regardless of sexuality, and their sexual and romantic lives are going to be messy, imperfect, and sometimes outright...toxic.

Hell, you could even interpret this tweet to mean that lesbian couples never even have small problems or arguments. Or times when they wonder if they’re truly in love. Or times when they realize they’re not and subsequently break up. 

That’s not true. And statements like this, even if they’re hyperbolic as I suspect this tweet was, don’t help fight toxic heterosexuality. They just idealize same-sex relationships as preferable to heterosexual ones (they aren’t), and suggest that people in same-sex relationships should be happy and loving all the time (they can’t be, because no one can). It sets up unrealistic standards and expectations for people, particularly those who are young, who have just come out, and/or who, for whatever reason, don’t have a lot of experience with sex and romance. 

Let’s just stop doing things like this. 

This kind of stuff is especially harmful to bisexual and other multi-spec women who are attracted to men. I hate constantly seeing wlw content that implies that f/f relationships are better than m/f ones and acting as if all multi-spec wlw wish they were lesbians or hate their attraction to men or think that all men are shitty boring jerks. Like sorry when I go into wlw spaces I def want to find support for the wlw part of me, but my attraction to men, and my current loving relationship with one(who is also bi), is not lesser or boring or shameful, and I do not want to be constantly reminded that the wlw community thinks I should hate that part of myself when I seek positivity and support.

Like I get it we all want to joke to deal with thousands of years of hatred towards lesbians and f/f relationships but when it comes to a point that you are acting like all f/f relationships are pure and perfect and all m/f are inherently lesser or boring we maybe have gone a little bit too far. This mindset hurts straight women, it hurts bi women, and it hurts lesbians. Fucking stop.